Today's been tough. Mentally I'm not 'there' and there's a lot of things I feel I'm struggling with.
This band thing is starting to really get me down. I used to love playing but its slowly being sucked out of me by the 'turn down' man. Jennie and Dad are coming along on Friday to tell me whether I am actually too loud. My thoughts are that I'm OK and that Mr Turn-Down just doesn't like a bit of stage volume..... Anyway, having trusted people in the place where they need to be to judge volume (the middle of the crowd, not the front row) will be a big help and make me feel comfortable again. I just want to enjoy playing. :(
I'm not looking forward to doing the Center Parcs email tomorrow. There was a time when I'd fly into it like a dog chasing a car but my energy levels are so low and the depression is gripping..... I just want to hide away....
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